Marriage as a School of Virtue
February is considered the month of love, thanks to the celebration of the Feast of Saint Valentine, which began in the 8th century. World Marriage Day also happens each February in the Church. Did you ever consider that marriage serves as a school of virtue, shaping not only spouses, but also their children, and, by extension, society?
The Sacrament of Marriage: A Visible Sign of God's Grace
In the Catholic tradition, marriage is more than a contract; it's a sacrament. This means it's a visible sign of God's grace, uniting a man and woman in a bond blessed by God Himself. Through this sacramental union, couples receive special graces to grow in holiness together.
As we strive, at Pinecrest Academy, to form Christian leaders who will transform society, we recognize that this transformation begins at home. In the crucible of married life, spouses learn to live out their vows daily, receiving and giving love in a way that reflects Christ's love for His Church.
The Domestic Church: A School of Virtue
The Catechism of the Catholic Church beautifully describes the family as the domestic church. In paragraph 1657, it states:
"It is here that the father of the family, the mother, children, and all members of the family exercise the priesthood of the baptized in a privileged way 'by the reception of the sacraments, prayer and thanksgiving, the witness of a holy life, and self-denial and active charity.' Thus, the home is the first school of Christian life and 'a school for human enrichment.' Here one learns endurance and the joy of work, fraternal love, generous - even repeated - forgiveness, and above all divine worship in prayer and the offering of one's life."
This domestic church begins with marriage itself. A husband and wife, united with the Holy Trinity, form this sacred space even before children arrive. One’s vocation as a spouse precedes and informs one’s vocation as a parent. This primacy of marriage reminds us of the need to invest time and energy in building a strong marital foundation.
In the daily give-and-take of married life, spouses have countless opportunities to practice virtues such as humility, patience, kindness, generosity, and prudence. These virtues, cultivated in the setting of marriage, become the bedrock of family life and, ultimately, of a virtuous society.
Marriage: A Universal School of Virtue
While children are often seen as the most visible fruit of marriage, consider that virtue is an even more universal fruit of sacramental unions. Not every married couple can conceive children, but every marriage is called to be a school of virtue.
As couples embrace the sacred nature of their union and navigate through life's challenges together, they are bound to grow in virtue. Patience grows as spouses learn to accept each other's flaws. Kindness flourishes in daily acts of service. Gentleness emerges in the tender care for each other's hearts. Joy springs from shared experiences. Gratitude deepens as spouses recognize the gift they have in each other.
These virtues, nurtured in marriage, extend far beyond the home. They shape how spouses interact with colleagues, neighbors, and strangers. In this way, virtuous marriages become a leaven in society, fostering unity, compassion, and mutual respect within the home and in ever-widening circles.
Mirroring Virtue to Children
For those blessed with children, the role of marriage as a school of virtue takes on an additional dimension. Parents evolve from being students of virtue to becoming primary teachers of virtue. Marriage becomes a living textbook from which children learn how to love, forgive, persevere, and sacrifice.
Consider these practical ways to instill virtues in your children:
· Model the virtues: Children are keen observers. Let them see you practicing patience when faced with frustrations, kindness when dealing with difficult people, and humility when admitting mistakes.
· Name and praise virtues: When you notice your child exhibiting a virtue, name it and praise them for it. "I saw how patient you were with your little brother. That was really kind of you."
· Use storytelling: Share stories from your own life or from literature that illustrate virtues in action. Discuss what virtues the characters displayed and how your children might apply them in their own lives.
· Create opportunities for practice: Give your children age-appropriate responsibilities that allow them to practice virtues like diligence, honesty, and perseverance.
· Discuss virtues regularly: Make virtue a regular topic of family conversation. At dinner, you might ask, "What act of kindness did you see or do today?"
Marriage as a Cornerstone of Societal Renewal
Authentic societal renewal doesn't come primarily through political or economic means, but through the cultivation of personal virtue and holiness, which can be beautifully exemplified through a loving, committed marriage.
By embracing marriage as a sacrament, couples open themselves to God's grace, helping them to become not only better spouses and parents but also better citizens. As a community, when we support and strengthen marriages, we're not just building stronger families - we're laying the foundation for a more just, compassionate, and virtuous society.
Matthew Chicoine is a left-handed cradle Catholic who enjoys reading everything Tolkien, C.S. Lewis, Chesterton and is also an avid comic book fan. He is married to his wife Jennifer and has four children. Matthew’s favorite saints include Athanasius, Catherine of Siena, Teresa of Avila, Philip Neri and John of the Cross. Discover more of his Catholic content by visiting: thesimplecatholic.blog
